Parents who think they can pinpoint when their teen’s life went off the rails are often surprised to learn how wrong they are.
Venture Academy therapist and clinical director Connie Buckle says parents will often point to a teen’s drug use or criminal behaviour as the problem when in fact it is merely a symptom of a much deeper problem.
“We ask parents when the difficulty first started and in almost every case it wasn’t something that started last weekend or last month,” Buckle said.
It’s much like a pot of boiling water; something that progresses slowly over time.
Buckle says it’s essential that families reattach with one another.
“The secret is very simple: families spending quality time and being mindful while they’re doing it,” she says. “This means when families are having dinner, for example, they are connecting and engaging through conversation as opposed to watching television.”
“Parents need to plan regular time as a family unit, focusing on relationship building. This cannot be done at the same time as checking email, using the blackberry or catching up on work. Similarly, it does not take place while a child is engrossed in video games or on the computer.”
Buckle says families without rituals like family dinners have no opportunity to come together in one central place for any reason other than one involving conflict.
Human Development Professor Reed Larson agrees consistency and predictability is key during the often-tumultuous teen years.
Lawson says when possible it’s best parents postpone major life changes until after the teen years. His study shows teens inundated with transitions and stressful life events – like moving to a new home or city – were the most moody.
“If a move to a new home or city or change in the household, like an aging grandparent moving into the home can wait, things will probably be easier,” he said in an article posted on 24/7. “If the home is a place that’s filled with hassles, it will only make living in the same house more stressful for everyone.”
Read Additional Articles
- Family meals provide calm during stormy teen years
- Host Families Key to Venture Academy’s Success
- Legal But Lethal – Cough Medicine Abuse in Teens
- Help for Troubled Teens Just a Phone Call Away
- Education Key to Preventing Teen Inhalant Abuse
- Challenging the Challenged – ADHD in Teens
- How Troubled is Your Troubled Teen? Take the Test and Find Out
- Troubled Teen Director to Oversee Venture Academy’s Ontario Campus
- Troubled Teens Need Help Parents Can’t Provide
- Schools’ Overzealous In Use of Discipline to “Treat” Troubled Teens
- Family Service Specialist Joins Team at Venture Academy for Troubled Teens
- Boot Camps for Teens – Are they right for your teen?
- Sleep Takes Backseat to Teen Media Use, Study Finds
- Teen relationships affected by screen time
- Teen Drinking Never Safe
- Sexting Teens Put Their Futures At Risk
- Teen Boot Camps Soon to be Extinct
- Future looks bright for troubled teen
- Cyberbullying Teens Harass the Helpless
- Treating Troubled Teens: When holding back means sending your teen to residential treatment
- Defiant teen get life back on track with help from Venture Academy
- Top 5 Reasons to Say “Yes” to Venture Academy For Troubled Teens and “No” to Boot Camp
- Spying on Your Teen in the Text Generation
- Rebellious teen and her mom reconnect with help from Venture Academy
- Residential Treatment Program for Troubled Teens Expands Into Ontario